HERE'S WHY MY ORIGINAL BLOG GOT SHUT DOWN

I was listening to the "TV's Top 5" podcast this morning and they mentioned that Kyle Killen signed a deal with FOX. I chuckled because Mr. Killen had something to do with my original blog being shut down.

At FOX, he did a series for us called LONE STAR which was one of the biggest disasters of my career. He followed that up with some other bombs on other networks. there was a pattern to his pilots which, I felt, doomed them.

Anyway, after LONE STAR premiered I wrote a piece for my blog about why it failed. I never used my name and, back then, denied I was the Masked Scheduler but people knew and I found myself in my bosses office where I was told to shut down the blog. I asked my boss if he ever read it and he said no. I explained that it was mostly about my experiences in the business and mostly about my first network scheduling gig. It didn't matter to him. I'm certain he got a few calls from some thin-skinned dipshits at our studio, or some agents or whatever.

I suppose I could have kept the blog going but I probably would have been fired so I just said "OK", went back to my desk and shut it down after first saving the content. I just said to myself "Revenge is a dish best served cold". I knew I would be retiring in a few years and would fire up the blog again. Now you know the origin of the title of the blog.

Over the years my blog became an underground classic and I would get emails asking for a copy of the content. I freely gave it away never asking anything in return. I have been asked why I never turned it into a book. I just prefer to share.

I realized that I never re-published the LONE STAR piece so here it is. I wish Mr. Killen well. That 1.0 18-49 rating would get a renewal now so his time has finally come. 

My son is a junior at the University of Kansas and every year I head out to Lawrence for a football weekend. A Jayhawk game on Saturday and then, on Sunday, off to Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City to see the Chiefs. The Sunday game  against the 49'ers was outstanding. The Chiefs are one of three 3-0 teams in the NFL and, although I am a life long Giants fan, it was fun being part of the celebration.  This is a team that has been losing quite consistently of late. 

After I made the plans for the weekend it suddenly dawned on me that I was heading to Lawrence halfway through premiere week. It was a needed change. We woke up on Tuesday morning to some pretty dismal numbers for LONE STAR so it was a relief to be somewhere other than Los Angeles, somewhere where none of this shit really matters. In fact, after returning, I was telling everyone who would tolerate me that it was refreshing to be in an environment where I did not see one billboard for a network show. 

In LA one is inundated with messages and we start to believe that everyone cares......and we go on social media.........Well this Tuesday, the LONE STAR ratings declined from the premiere and we accepted that we were looking at a show that was rejected. There is no other way to put it. Some of us used the R word last week but we sucked it in and gave the show another shot. We tried. We added more promos for LONE STAR in HOUSE....three minutes to be exact.....didn't matter. We were very professional about things and made the moves to hopefully strengthen our schedule.

How did this happen? Yeah, all networks have their misses but this was beyond that. I'm going to be as honest as I can about this. I will probably piss some people off. I will begin with a quote....actually a tweet about the LONE STAR premiere ratings from a colleague of mine at another network "Audience-1 Critics-0" He was right.

This has been a pretty bland Fall season.....from a critics point of view....After last season's GLEE and MODERN FAMILY this year's batch of shows just felt sort of lame and generic so LONE STAR, by default, became a critical darling. It felt different when compared to the other freshmen shows and, when network executives use the word "cable" to describe the series' sensibility....well that's just orgasmic. So expectations started to far exceed the reality of the show's potential. 

This show was problematic but we took the gamble knowing full well it would either break out or crash and burn....no middle ground here. Network executives actually start to believe the critic quotes and even love to put them in promos. Here's the problem.....those Chiefs fans who were out of their minds in ecstasy on Sunday could give a flying fuck about LONE STAR and it appears that most of America felt the same. We have evidence and data up the wazoo that critic's quotes don't matter and, in fact, are a turn-off to the audience and yet we use them. 

Now here's where it gets to be fun. Rather than "Hey maybe we just missed the mark on this one" The critics look for reasons why the network fucked up because how can the rest of America reject a show that they love.They're idiots and they deserve Snokie and Bristol Palin etc. and FOX executives should listen to us because we are more knowledgeable as to how to schedule and market LONE STAR to guarantee its success. 

When I started out at NBC in Burbank, my boss Warren Littlefield gave me the best advise about the scheduling job. Warren said: "You have the ultimate second guess job". I live by that wisdom.  So rather than get all worked up about this stuff, I just chuckle. Gang, this show was REJECTED. Deal with it. We have. Rather than pointing fingers or belittling the audience we accept that this show just did not resonate with the viewers but hey we took the shot. We were wrong. Let me let you in on a little secret.....it's just television.....shit happens. 

You go online Tuesday after we cancelled LONE STAR and it felt like a fucking wake....gimme a break. When a show premieres with ratings like this and then drops to a 1.0 in 18-49's in week two.....it's not about whether we should have saved the show for later in the season (I advocated that in May but lost that one) or whether there was a better slot for it on the schedule (other shows premiered on our schedule in tough time periods to better ratings) and I don't think that there was a marketing campaign that would have significantly pumped up the ratings. I think that we were always between a rock and a hard place with this show.

I don't read all the analyses of why LONE STAR didn't work but here was my fear from the beginning: We have just suffered through an horrific economic crisis brought on by excess and illusions, we saw the devastating environmental impact of an oil spill and the resulting lack of response and indifference on the part of a large corporation as well as the government. The last thing that every day Americans want to see right now is a good looking con man who is fucking over two innocent young women who have done nothing wrong other than to love him. A con man who eventually will leave these two women and their families in ruins. This is where it has to go....anything else is bullshit and, had we kept it on, would have lead to some major eye rolling by the very people bemoaning its demise. You can't redeem this guy and everyone around him has to suffer....just ask Rita, Carmela or Betty. Dexter, Don and Tony were family men and that informed their actions...but they never looked for redemption. 

If we want to do a cable show then do a fucking cable show but anticipate cable ratings. Sorry critics, LONE STAR was never going to be a "hit" on a broadcast network. We took the gamble and we moved on. So it goes. There's a big country between the coasts. There was no way that enough viewers were going to condone bigamy even with a somewhat sympathetic attractive lead. The audience was not conned. We had some big hurdles to overcome and we stumbled right out of the gate. 

Do we learn from this? Well that's for another day. Oh by the way....for those of you who wander on here once in a while you may have read that I just don't get GLEE....well again my trip to the mid-west helped me to get some perspective. It was Band Day in Lawrence, Kansas and, at halftime of the Jayhawk game, several high school bands from the region performed on the field together with the Jayhawk Marching Band. Prior to the half the kids were parading around the stadium getting into position for the performance. These are kids from the middle of the country...all sizes, shapes and ethnicities, all coming together to make music with the big college band on the big college field. They were smiling and excited...there were kids in wheelchairs. This was a big deal to them.....they were all GLEEFULL....it all started to make sense.

ROYAL RUMBLE 2020 PREDICTIONS AND HOLY SHIT ASSUMPTIONS

Been busy this week but thought I would go through my predictions and Holy Shit (💩) projections for tonight’s Royal Rumble.

I have to say I feel underwhelmed by this card but I have been wrong in the past and the WWE can often over deliver so we’ll see. Anyway…..

SHEAMUS V. CHAD GABLE

I grew up with a friend who had growth issues and it was horrible. We spent hours talking about it so I’m sort of sensitive to all this. I think Chad Gable is a tremendous wrestler but this is Vince McMahon’s WWE. Chad will hold his own but Sheamus will prevail in a 💩1/2 match.

ROMAN V. THE KING

I don’t give a shit 💩 match

ANDRADE CIEN ALMAS V. BABYFACE CARRILLO

This should be one of the better matches of the night and I hope they keep the belt on Andrade and Zelina and let Humberto continue his journey. I think even WWE booking knows that’s the move. This should be at least a 💩💩💩💩 match.

BAYLEY V. THE MARINE

I may be in the minority but I really like heel Bayley and her partner Sasha Banks. You know at some point these two will be adversaries and hopefully give us another classic. I don’t get the Evans face turn. It feels fake. She feels fake. I think they give her the belt. Hope I’m wrong. I’ll go 💩 here.

BECKY V. ASUKA

It’s time for Becky to start a new journey and if there is a God she drops the belt and they give it to the best wrestler they have. Becky doesn’t need the belt and, if I was booking, I would get Asuka and Kairi Sane in a program culminating at Wrestlemania. Trust me it will be unforgettable. Assuming Shayna is coming up and Rousey returns for a bit you have Becky, Charlotte and the two MMA women feuding in various combinations. Sadly, I think Becky retains in a 💩💩1/2 match.

FIEND V. DB

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, a gimmick WWE Champ is bullshit. Bryan’s awesome, Bray’s OK. It will be fine and Kane will get involved so Bray retains by DQ in a 💩💩💩 match. I am not looking forward to the red.

WOMENS RUMBLE

The way they have booked this who the fuck knows. Figure Shayna appears and maybe Rousey and then there’s Charlotte. I assume the winner will go after the RAW belt. The fun will come from the NXT women who are the best but I figure one of the three mentioned above will win.

Should be 💩💩1/2 match.

MENS RUMBLE

Putting Brock #1 was one of the more inspired moves by, I assume Mr. Heyman. There are two possibilities:

By some miracle Brock goes through the entire roster and demands a unification match with the WWE Champ at Wrestlemania. Or…..

Someone eliminates Brock and goes on to win the Rumble. So, who could it be? It can’t be Roman. It better not be Corbin. I see three possibilities.

Randy Orton. He faced Brock once before. Bled a lot in a short match but you know he would put on a solid match at WM.

Drew McIntyre. He’s got the size, the mike skills and can be an excellent face.

Aleister Black. Don’t even know if he is in the Rumble but he would be my pick. You can strap a rocket to this dude and he and Lesnar could be an epic Wrestlemania main event. Watching him eliminate Brock would be a stunner.

Having said all this, I think it’s Drew. There’s a lot of talent here. I’m going 💩💩💩💩1/2’s

I think that’s the card. I’ve been more excited about Rumbles in the past. Dazzle me.

SEINFELD HOLIDAY GIFTS

Of all the shows that I have been associated with at two  networks, the most generous when it came to holiday gifts was Seinfeld. Every year we would anxiously wait for the present to arrive and we were never disappointed. I still have many of them and I thought that today being Festivus (also the day Jerry told my boss Warren Littlefield that he would not be doing another season) I would share those gifts with you. There may be others lying around my house but these are the ones that I could dig up.

The first gift that I could remember is no longer with me. I used it every day through much of my time at NBC and when I moved on to FOX I actually threw it away. It was pretty disgusting. It was a black leather script bag which I used to carry whatever back and forth from the office. I can only imagine what crap I has spilled in it over the years. I gave it a decent burial.

One of the simpler gifts are something I use to this day. I have four Seinfeld cereal bowls.

You only see three here because the fourth is currently holding some hard boiled eggs in the fridge.

Another one of my prize possessions is this silk jacket which I wore quite often but I think it's too fragile now. By the way Seinfeld had a deal with Nike so many of the gifts are Nike branded.

George had a field jacket which he wore in several episodes and this arrived as our holiday surprise

I got a lot of use out of this one

One year Rick Ludwin, who oversaw Seinfeld and sadly passed recently, had his assistant Betty ask me for my shoe size. I had a feeling it had to do with that year's holiday gift. My good friend Vince Manze, our marketing guru, was out of the office that day and, when asked, his assistant did not know his shoe size. A few weeks later these arrived.

A delivery of sneakers arrived in the suite I shared with Rick and Vince. Vince went looking for his shoes only to discover that, because his assistant did not provide a size, he was shut out of that year's holiday gift. It was pretty uncomfortable in the office for several days.

Finally my favorite gift was this Seinfeld baseball jacket.

I don't believe that shows are as generous today, maybe you get a cap. It's more common to give to a charity rather than send something to executives who already have everything they need. Just as well.

TLC - THE CARD SO FAR

There’s just too much wrestling. We have definitely entered the “Peak Wrestling” era and it’s only going to get peakier. I wish I could say that we have an embarrassment of riches….we ,do have an embarrassment though. There’s very little that’s going right and a lot that’s going wrong.

AEW is OK and some sort of WCW/WWE Attitude Era hybrid but, honestly for me it’s not great just better than the WWE main roster shows which is not saying much.

I find myself watching more of the smaller promotions like NWA POWERRR, ROH and MLW (which, full disclosure, I have a connection) and there’s always NJPW. NXT is still fantastic and I’m hoping their moment to shine will not alter the promotion too much.

WWE has completely screwed up the SMACKDOWN transition to FOX. First there was Kofi jobbing to Lesnar, then the shitty draft, then Lesnar moves over to RAW and SMACKDOWN gets this joke called The Fiend, followed by “Saudi Blood Money” and finally the NXT invasion which sort of sells that the black and gold is the superior brand (they are). We are two months into the SMACKDOWN on FOX era and Smackdown has yet to establish an identity and all is in service to PPV’s.

Speaking of PPV’s I wish someone would tell me why I should care at all about TLC this Sunday especially when the WWE doesn’t even promote a card until the last moment. This feels more like just another “wild card rules” episode than a major event. It doesn’t even feel like it will be advancing many stories. For me it’s just an excuse to make a vat of PPV chili so there’s that.

Well here’s the card as we know it for the moment along with predictions (I assume every match has a winner knowing…yeah) and my patented “Holy Shit” 💩 projections.

Aleister Black vs. Buddy Murphy

This could be the match of the night and these two guys could well be the future. Not a fan of how they have built up Black’s character. Sort of silly asking someone to fight him while “hiding in a closet” on a show where everyone fights everyone but hopefully that’s behind him and us and now we can enjoy his talent along with his opponent Mr. Murphy. There is no loser in this battle but I assume Black goes over in a 💩💩💩💩1/2 match. Two guys who will be main-eventing in the future and for years to come. See I’m not all negative.

Viking Raiders Open Challenge

I don’t know why they didn’t save Street Prophets as those guys put on a pretty solid match with the VR’s on RAW this week and, to be honest, I don’t have a fucking clue what other tag teams are on the RAW roster so I’m going with the return of the USO’s or a surprise NXT team like Keith Lee and Dominik Dijakovic….ooooo I like that. Probably be AOP with Seth in the Paul Ellering role. Since this Open Challenge is a new thing for the Raiders I assume they prevail and, If it’s any of the above teams, could be a 💩💩💩 match.

Kabuki Warriors vs. Charlotte Flair & Becky Lynch ( tag team championship TLC match)

I’m so confused. Is the Women’s Tag Team Championship limited to RAW or is it still interpromotional? Regardless this the match that can go in many directions and features three of my favorite wrestlers in Asuka, Kairi Sane and Charlotte. Becky’s OK. This should be a 💩💩💩💩 match and I don’t see what value putting the belts on Charlotte and Becky gets you so I’m going with the Kabukis prevailing with a Charlotte/Becky feud coming out of this.

The New Day (c) vs. The Revival (SmackDown tag team championship)

I don’t care, I really really really don’t care. Love The New Day but I feel like I’ve seen this so many times and The Revival are solid wrestlers but boring and TND don’t need belts….they are transcendent at this point. I’ll go Revival in a 💩💩 match just so I can get on with the next one.

Rusev vs. Bobby Lashley (Tables match)

I guess the only positive that I see in this story is if it’s building up Rusev for a main event run or, at least a mid-card title. This dude has some potential and the WWE has never figured out how to take him to the next level. Catherine is a terrible actress and I will eat my mask if she does not go through the table. Going with Rusev in a 💩1/2 match.

Roman Reigns vs. Baron Corbin (TLC match)

Another feud that has gone on way too long and I have zero interest. There’s heat and then there’s hate and when it comes to King Corbin I’m in the hate zone and I hope this is the end of it but my fear is we’re going on for a while maybe with his crown on the line soon. Whatever, it’s Roman in another 💩1/2 match and the one most likely to not end in a clean finish. There will be dog food.

Bray Wyatt vs. The Miz

OK so is this The Fiend v. The Miz or Bray Wyatt v. The Miz. Is it for the Smackdown Championship or is it for the Miz’s family? I have no idea and this is all leading to something else most likely the return of the new old new Daniel Bryan as some sort of Fiend functionary who will feud with Miz all the way to Wrestlemania. I guess we’ll wait to see if we’re seeing red in a 💩 match with Fiend/Wyatt victorious along with a Bryan run in.

That’s what we know so far. There are still three belts unaccounted for and there’s always a cruiserweight match and it’s only Wednesday so I’ll update Saturday morning although the WWE will be adding to the card on Sunday afternoon I’m sure.